Category: lolita survival tips

I Spy DIY

via HonestlyWTF

New York Fashion Week has just begun, and while we all can’t get inside the tents at Lincoln Center nor wear the high-end designer brands, we can at least look like it.

And I don’t mean schlepping to Chinatown to buy fakes (because people who matter can often tell).

Sometimes all it takes is a glue gun, some creativity, and a trip to Micheals. I love sites like ISpyDIY, HonestlyWTF, Violet LeBeaux, and sometimes Cupcakes and Cashmere because they offer a lot of tutorials on making editorial-worthy projects with simple materials.  ISpyDIY and HonestlyWTF tutorials focus on items and projects that could be easily seen in a magazine spread but you could also make yourself with a few tools.

And they look just as good.

DIY is an ongoing trend amongst Lolitas and general fashion followers who want to make outfits even more unique and personalized. Not only that but incorporating DIY items can reignite your passion for Lolita fashion if it’s been fading for awhile.  It also can be inexpensive (depending on the project). And of course a fun project to show off to your friends and family.

In Gothic Lolita Bibles and JFashion mooks you can find patterns for dresses and accessories.  However sometimes they require a higher-level of sewing skill I don’t have. I do however crochet and knit quite a bit, and when wearing Lolita coordinates I try to include more handmade accessories for a more personalized touch.  Well done handmade accessories are not only small projects you can devote a day to, but they are often simple enough that anyone can do.

Plus it’s nice to brag about something you’ve made.

Here are a few of my favorites that are on my “Nothing-To-Do” list.

For those who crochet/knit, sites like Ravelry, Lionbrand, and Caron are great free resources for patterns (Note: For access to Ravelry and Lionbrand you would need to sign up for an account; plus side it’s free).  And if you are looking for specific patterns look towards Etsy and eBay – especially when it comes to finding vintage patterns and the like.

FYeah Lolita has a post on a long informative list of tutorials I simply can’t compete with.

Do you have any projects you’ve been meaning to work on? Whether it be a massive sewing project or something you’ve been meaning to try? 

What’s in a Name?

Will the real Lolita please stand up?

When I first started wearing Lolita, I would always avoid the term with a passion. Mainly because of its Western connotation to Vladimir Nabakov’s novel of the same name. However after four years I can confirm that the only aspect the novel and the Japanese fashion have in common is a reverence for youthful appearance.

To this day I tend to respond “We’ve decided to dress up.” when others asking what or why are you wearing such clothes.  People respond better to this and there’s no need to include “Lolita” in your response.  However if people are persistence, then if you must use the term “Lolita fashion.”  Only when you have no other options.

People within this fashion community have attempted to relabel Lolita but to no avail. As such instead of relabeling the fashion, relabel yourself.

If you are taking the plunge or having second thoughts whether you should try Lolita fashion – remember it is just a name. Sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will never hurt me.  While it’s true that words do hurt you, it hurts only a little bit at first.  And if you have the right petticoat and the right amount of friends, they will just bounce off.

You are not a Lolita, you are you.  It just so happens you like to wear clothes with a petticoat and blouses with puffed sleeves. The label Lolita is attached to style of dress, not you.  Giving a name power by calling it taboo is absurd, because at the end of the day you are wearing a blouse/skirt/one-piece/jumperskirt from Angelic Pretty/ Baby the Stars Shine Bright/ Innocent World/ Metamorphose/etc.  These happen to be designer brands associated with Lolita fashion.

While it does feel like a magical girl transformation from regular you to Lolita you — you are still the same underneath.  Nothing changes.  “Lolita” is just a name.

So pronounce it with me (it’s on the tip of your tongue).

Lo. Lee. Ta.

From the Littlest Frill to the Rest of the World

I’ll give you a guess which one is me, given this post. Taken by doctorginger

One of the reasons I was into Lolita fashion was that I could fit into the clothes. I’m well under 5 feet and not growing anymore anytime soon. Being extremely petite makes find any clothes in XS or shoes in size 5 is like mining a beach with a metal detector. So noticing that most of the Japanese sizes were more to my measurements I was very thrilled.

However I slowly learned this was not always the case.

There are cries from people that Lolita fashion designers should make things larger to accommodate fuller figures and larger sizes. There are also people who try to drastically lose weight to fit into the clothes so they can actually have room to breathe. There are plenty of posts about which pieces and Lolita brands that can fit almost any size.

But what about the other side of the spectrum?

Personally, I can tell you it’s not all that great either and there’s no reason to be jealous. You chances of looking more childlike increases by alot. A lot. You have to pay more attention to minimum measurements than the maximum. Ribbon-laced corsets can only do so much (and forget about shirring).

A lot of items will fit but not all; and it might even be your dream dress. As a result I’ve come to accept and learn a few things.

You won’t always fit into everything. My first brand dress was an Alice and the Pirates sailor jumperskirt. I bought it online directly from the shop and was ecstatic when it arrived. However the dress was still big when loosely cinched with the belt. It was closer to my ankles than I would’ve liked. I looked a five-year-old ready to head to the beach. Look at the all measurement closely and also look at the range (if there is some shirring or too much room for a blouse). Make sure you fall midway or a well above the minimum. And make sure all the measurements are closer to your own. A waist might be fine but then the bust might be too big. Or the bust is perfectly but the rest is a tent.

Brands that are forgiving and not. I feel this is an obligatory section since some people may need specifics. Victorian Maiden pays attention to one size and one size only; so exact measurements are important. Unfortunately this is probably the reason it is my favorite designer. I do know Angelic Pretty runs smaller alot of the times, but only if you like Sweeter or do retro-pop styles. Metamorphose is more generous to those who are fuller so should be considered if you like that looser fit. Baby the Stars Shine Bright and Innocent World are brands that I turn to more often and fill majority of my closet. However regardless of designer brand, I hold the measurement of the garment above all.

It’s going to be a little long. Most people when they seen Lolita coordinates and press images, the dress or skirt is usually above knee-length. But if you are classified as petite (under 5’5”) then it will most likely be a little below the knee. Sometimes a lot, in my case. However this works to your advantage as the length will appear more Mad-Men era style – a little above your ankle and well past your knee. Check the overall length since sometimes long can be too long, making you too short.

Shirring does not work in reverse. Someone said this at a panel about Lolita Style and Coordination. And it’s true. While this feature is a godsend for fuller figured people, clothes that have full-shirring (as in all the way round) should largely be avoided if you petite (and not necessarily busty). Clothes with half or a small amount of shirring is alright if there needs to be a small amount of stretch.

Ribbon-laced corsets are the exact same. There is such a thing as too cinched. When you can’t see a corset style at all and there’s still room then it wasn’t made to fit you. While this could be covered up with a cardigan or jacket, you can’t hide the extra long ribbons. (I still love my Chained Berry Memoir though)

The problem with flats. No one likes being vertically challenged, no matter how short/tall you are. With flats and rounded toes you can sometimes appear more childlike than you want. Heels not only make you slightly taller but give you a nice age-appropriate look. Chunky, wine-glass shaped heels are better than stiletto thin and have a more retro-look about them. However I don’t recommend wearing heels if you are not comfortable in them. They do take a lot of practice and you can seriously injure yourself if you don’t wear them all the time. Kitten heels work just as well and serve as a nice in between option. But if you like wear flats and tea-parties that’s just as fine. (They’re just not for me.)

Objects may look taller than they appear. For a petite person, you have to break up the your silhouette form. Style blogs often say wear skirts or natural waist items for an even-proportioned look. Unless you are going for boystyle you can’t change the skirt/dress portion by making it shorter. For a Lolita this means making parts look short and longer than they appear to be. A high-waisted skirt and ankle boots help people see you have legs and give a slight illusion you are a little taller. Cropped jackets bring more attention to the upper half and elongating the rest. A high-collared shirt can also force you to stand a little straighter and your head a little higher.

Give it up or coordinate really well. Let’s say you own a dress and you don’t want to sell it – but the fit is too big in some areas. And you don’t want to tailor it. For a skirt that is slightly too loose add a cute belt to cinch it in place. If the armholes or the chest is too large, cover-up with a nice cardigan or a suit jacket. Misako sometimes does this with coordinates. This makes a look more fitted. Another thing is if you are willing to do it is to tailor it yourself or take it to a tailor. If you plan to put it to good use and wear it a lot then by all means tailor.

But if you are unwilling to do any of these things, unfortunately you will have part with it. And I’ve parted with quite a few things both Lolita and regular clothes and shoes.

Majority of this is based on my own experiences and I’m only my own below-average size. As such I can’t relate to a lot of people, but I do hope that you can relate to me if you have the same or similar issues.

I’m also not asking designers to make more items for smaller sizes.

I’m just saying to not forget that small people have problems too.

There is No Lifestyle Just You (Wearing Lolita)

Right (Betty, Season One), Left (Betty, Season Four)

I’ve been finishing up Ugly Betty and notice a lot of similarities between Lolitas and the main character, Betty Suarez. For those who are unfamiliar with the show, Ugly Betty is originally a telenovela that was remade for American audiences. It follows a young, green college graduate who is immerse into the world of fashion journalism in New York City.  Just watching it and seeing a over the top version of the fashion industry makes you want to dress better.

While it only lasted four season, you notice a gradual change of Betty’s fashion sense has become, well, more fashionable.

Lolita fashion is the same.


We don’t all start out as fabulously coiffed and decked out Lolitas. It takes practice, practice, and more practice. But what’s important, is that no matter how crazy the fashion industry is, Betty is still herself (just in better styled clothes).

Lolita fashion is the same way, which is one of the reasons I don’t believe there is such thing as a “lifestyle” Lolita. I feel this implies that you’ve changed your outlook on life to reflect your appearance (when it should be the other way around).

Lolita fashion is certainly a catalyst to how you’ve changed to be a better you, but it shouldn’t change how you think just because you’re wearing Angelic Pretty. Maybe AP makes you think in a more optimistic view, but shouldn’t suddenly make you believe that unicorns are real or change your go-to drink to tea when you can’t live without coffee. Or suddenly have an affinity for pink (though that could be a side effect when you start liking Lolita fashion).

Not to mention there is no definitive line between when you weren’t a Lolita and when you could say “I am a Lolita, now.”

Like anything you’re passionate about, Lolita fashion should bring out qualities and characteristics you already have. Lolita just takes advantage of those qualities and brings them to the surface:

Coordination
You obviously know how to dress yourself and Lolita helps you know what looks better with other items in your existing closet. This includes your Lolita and non-Lolita outfits. With Lolita fashion you know you don’t always have to buy items to go with that one outfit.  A sense of coordination is always key for a minimal but versatile Lolita wardrobe and allows you to be more creative with your outfits.

Creativity
Everyone’s creative in their own way, whether they’ve realized it or not. Betty is always super creative and often gets the short end of compliments when it comes to her outfits.  Daily Lolita and Daily A La Mode are message boards full of outfit pictures that a Lolita can use for inspiration when they’re not sure how to wear something or how one can incorporate Lolita into their everyday outfit. The best part: how they wear Lolita are all different and hardly any outfits are carbon copies. In addition, the people who post are of different shapes and sizes (proving that you don’t have to be a size small to wear Lolita).  Most of all, these girls are comfortable in their own skin.

Confidence and Pride
Betty exudes a sense of pride in what she wears and doesn’t care about what others think about her outfit. If you talk to any Lolita enthusiast, they are always filled pride. They are proud to have discovered something that has made them a better, knowledgeable, and of course, fashionable person. It’s a weird feeling when you wear Lolita that you can’t quite describe. You feel overwhelmingly happiness, which is why some wear it on a bad day. This feeling is that you’ve found something that is entirely you and it will never leave you (even if you’re not in Lolita). How you dress determines how you act, but no matter what you should always be yourself.

Etiquette or Awareness of Situations/Surroundings.
This does not mean you need to drink tea and hold the cup with your left hand (pinky up). Rather it’s more that you understand you need to act a certain way depending on the situation. When dressed in Lolita you are very observant of your surroundings. Walking around in public dressed Lolita, you will get everything from sniperhsots to nasty cat calls to heaven-sent compliments. And while you should always have a thick, titanium-strength wall between you and them, always have a strong sense of politeness first, snark second. Even before you set out that door, you are critical on how you have styled your outfit and you practice until you look presentable. Does it fit with the meet-up theme? Have you tied the bow on your JSK correctly? Is the black bag your using okay with your Sweet Lolita coordinate?

Perserverance or Practice Makes Perfect. 
We all start out as beginners (I’m not partial to the term “ita”) and the Lolita you have become is much different from when you first started to get into the fashion. You strive to be the best stylish Lolita you can be and know there’s always a need for improvement. Everything is good (not great) and could be better. Whether it’s an accessory that’s missing from an awesome outfit to learning from that first handmade Lolita skirt, you are always practicing to be better. You’ll work hard to achieve your objective (the “ultimate Lolita you”), and never settle for less.

Do you feel Lolita has brought out qualities (positive ones) or even skills you never knew you had? Is there anything I’m missing? Are you a big fan of Ugly Betty? Please do tell!

When All Else Fails: Go to the Zoo

What are these things called lines?

The great thing about living in a metropolitan city is always having somewhere to go, something to see. New Yorkers walk at breakneck speeds to their destinations – even when getting lost. However sometimes your itinerary for the day is the exact same as ten thousands others. Leaving you with the following options: A) Wait in an incredible long line (Lines? Who are you kidding.), B) Come up with another plan, or C) Turn around and go home and back to sleep.

This is partially inspired by my plans for the holiday weekend. The other half had July 4th weekend spectacular plan:

Friday – Movie at home
Sunday – New York Hall of Science (Thanks to Bank of America’s Museums on Us) or the Queens Zoo (if the Hall of Science was too preschool for our taste), then food of some sort.

Monday – Off to the Cooper-Hewitt, National Design Museum of New York to check out the Van Cleef & Arpels exhibit, and having lunch at Alice’s Tea Cup.

What actually happened was:


Friday – Shake Shack had a special Independence Day menu that included their Blueberry Pie Oh-My concrete (complete with slice of blueberry pie) that the boy had to try. As a bonus he also wanted a corn dog. I went with the corn dog and Last Jelly’s Donut concrete (complete with one Doughnut Plant donut). The result, Shake Shack never disappoints and two Conretes is a good reason to kill any other plans.

Sunday – A friend wanted to join us in our holiday adventures, overslept, and delayed our Hall of Science trip by a few hours.

Monday – There was a line to get into the Cooper-Hewitt, National Design Museum that spanned a block and a half. The museum was at capacity thanks to free admission. Our next objective was to check out the Ai WeiWei exhibit at Asia Society (closed). Then we just decided to throw our hands up in the air and headed to the Central Park Zoo (which never fails in entertainment).

What have you learned from my mistakes? While you can have a solid, fail-proof Plan A, make sure you also have plans B – F in place too. Anything can happen.

Here are some tips to remember when your initial plan has to change because you’re not willing to wait (you are a New Yorker after all):

  • Always have a back-plan – and a back-up to your back-up.
  • Carry water and wear decent walking shoes for dead-end wandering.
  • Have an umbrella on hand for unpredictable showers.
  • A charged cell-phone. It is always a downer when your phone dies just when you receive a text from the host of that Lolita meet-up to tell you it’s cancelled.
  • Spare change/cash for a taxi or public telephone or for the woman selling $1 water out of a cooler
  • Change of clothes if you’re in Lolita and it’s late or if a meet has unexpectedly been cancelled or postponed.
  • And lastly never give up and go home from having and adventure.

Finally here are pictures from our adventure (what you’ve probably been waiting for).

Independence Day Weekend’s Friday Dinner
Are they waiting for food or their master(s)?

Hot summers means a crowded penguin house.

Can you spot the ducklings?
Jack rabbit
Bunnies may be larger than they appear.
Ai WeiWei’s Zodiac statues
Burritos and quesadillas at Blockheads

Have you ever had a day not go as planned? Did you give up or try to find something else to do?

Frills, Pants and Cake – Lessons in Kodona

There are times when donning the dress, the petticoat, the bloomers, the tights, rocking horse shoes tends to be cumbersome. And reserving that extra two hours of primping your hair and face to be picture perfect becomes increasingly tedious and time-consuming.

There are days when you just feel like wearing pants.

While majority population of lovers of Lolita fashion are girls, not all of them are fond of wearing skirts and petticoats. Some prefer to be the princely counterpart, the crook for her arm, or to simply stand out even further amongst the sea of skirts.

Boystyle, as it’s commonly known (also kodona or ouiji. I tend to define kodona as a younger version, and ouiji looking like a fop), is a subcategory in Lolita fashion, and the name pretty much explains it.

Dress androgynously and feel dandy. Tap into your inner George Sand.

However “boystyle” is not just throwing on your Sunday best. You should be as meticulous, if not more so, with your appearance as much as you do when wearing Lolita. In addition, you don’t have to buy brand (but a pair of Alice and the Pirates pants won’t hurt either).

When dressing “boystyle” you should consider a few things:

  • Use a three-piece suit as a model. For those unsure of the term, it usually encompasses a jacket, a vest, and trousers (or capri pants for a more youthful look). For a casual look stick with vest and trousers.
  • Iron everything! No one likes a wrinkled shirt. You’ll not only feel neater and cleaner (but you’ll impress your mom too).  Optional: creating a crease in your dress pants.
  • Avoid Shakespearean “poet shirts” – they tend to give off that costume appearance. 
  • Whether you’re a girl or guy, make sure tuck your shirt in. No one likes the unkempt look (unless that’s the look you’re going for)
  • A vest hides everything!
  • Dandy and Wit has good tutorials if you’re unsure how to tie a bowtie or need to pack a suit coat.
  • When you wear suspenders make sure you know how to get out of them in case of an emergency.
  • The sky’s the limit when it comes to shoes. Platforms, noisy dress shoes, and heels never hurt anyone (Louis XIV wore heels and nobody complained). Just make sure it works with the outfit, but not overdone.
  • For inspiration I recommend look for any period movies with Hugh Grant. Also Paul Bettany in A Beautiful Mind.
  • When in doubt: Keep it simple!
Hope this helps if you ever decide to try boystyle or want to simply impress a girl you know how to dress. Or just want to be manly for a day. 

Valentine’s Day – Eat, Indulge, Distract, Repeat

Valentine Day’s should be celebrated for the sake of being able to wear red, eat lots of sweets, and watch lots of sappy movies. While you could do this any day, February 14th is a good excuse as any, especially if you’re planning to sulk and be like every other “woe is me.”

Whether you are enjoying it as a couple, single, or with friends, you should just plain enjoy Valentine’s Day. It’s a holiday, after all.

So plan a rocking outfit, grab some friends (or drag the significant other), and go out on the town. Or find some comfort in front of the couch with some cheezy movies. Here are some ideas to get you started.
Out on the Town
– Going to Dances of Vice never fails in entertainment. Monday is Amor y Tango at the Highline Ballroom.
– The Hayden Planetarium at the American Museum of Natural History presents “Romance Under the Stars” a classy night with champagne, hor d’oeurves, chocolate covered strawberries, and music followed by a planetarium show of the night sky.
– Have dinner at a restaurant you’ve never been to. Restaurant Week is still happening so it’s a good opportunity to spend a little more than your normal price range.
– You be the judge for this year’s Oscar-nominated animated films. Playing at the IFC Center.
– Go straight for dessert at Holey Cream. (And walk to the station to make the guilt go away for a little bit.)

Comfort is Key
– Buy food from your favorite takeout place and eat to your hearts content. Perhaps get a fancy dessert from Financier on your way home to end the night.
– Or finally bake those sugar cookies you been meaning to. Once that sweet smell of sugar is in the air you’ll forget its the 14th.
– Wear the comfiest outfit you can find. (Snuggies count!)
– Drink out of champagne or wine glasses. (Doesn’t have to be alcohol.)
– Grab your laptop and do some retail therapy. Feeling better means buying something to make your heart flutter.
– Video Skype with your best friend and watch a movie together.

Don’t be Ashamed
– Eat cookie dough out of the package. (It’s okay it’s Valentines Day meaning its a day to indulge in sweets)
– Watch really bad romance movies.  Nothing beats a day that celebrates love with a good laugh and unrealistic plotlines. (I recommend Leap Year or if horror movies are more you’re thing, House of Wax. Valentine’s Day is never complete without watching Paris Hilton get an axe to the head.)
– If you want to spend it alone, that doesn’t mean you have to be literally alone.  Gather all your stuffed animal friends and have them join you on the couch for some reality TV.

Distract Yourself
– It’s a good day as any to clean. Start Spring Cleaning early.
– Organize your Lolita closet again. It’s good to re-organize your wardrobe every now and then because it means finding something you haven’t worn or a skirt or hat you just have no use for now.
– Start that sewing project you’ve been meaning to get to.
– Pick a book out of your local library (or buy one) that peaks your interest (i.e. The Bro Code by Barney Stintson anyone?).

Whatever you do, do something fun. Even if that means just wearing an awesome Lolita outfit or counting down to the Valentine’s Day candy clearance sale at your local Rite Aid. What are your plans? I’d love to hear them!

Fall Gracefully: Tips for the Casual Ice Skater + Where to Skate

There are times where I wish I could ice skate like Michelle Trachtenberg in Ice Princess. If you haven’t seen it, it’s about a nerdy girl who uses simple physics and learns how to ice skate like a pro. (I recommend it if you’re looking for B-movie goodness.) While we can’t all skate like Michelle Kwan, we can learn how to fall.

If you have ever taken lessons or even tried for the first time, you know you’re going to fall (at least once).

I still love ice skating.  When I first moved to New York and found out that Bryant Park had an ice rink, it was like longing to relive a childhood memory. I took lessons in middle school, but never kept it up. Surprisingly it’s like riding a bike. Even in Lolita.

If your a Lolita who loves to ice skate or always wanted to try, here’s some advice:


Wear gloves. Gloves are warm, the ice is not. Glove can provide some protection against the ice if you do fall or if you hand gets cut against someone else’s blade. Preferably anything that looks cute like Meta’s Princess Gloves.

Petticoats are your friend. While it’s not always advantageous to wear petticoats a lot of the time, that cumbersome volume does ease your fall. It’s not good as knee or elbow pads or even a butt pad, but it will create distant between the hard ice and tender skin.

If you know you’re going to fall, try to fall on your butt. Compared to any other angle to fall, this is the safest. This does not mean you should fall all the way back (I’ve seen this happen). Avoid areas to fall like your head, face, joints as these are very fragile area.

Ice skating is a dangerous sport. You can get hurt. If you don’t realize this then you shouldn’t be ice skating. Like the old saying goes – it’s all fun and games until someone gets hurt. Now if you are aware of this and are still ready to tackle the ice, we’ll move onto the fun stuff.

Imagine you are a little bird learning to fly. This is a metaphor I use whenever I help people who’ve never set there foot on the ice. A) Because a little bird is afraid and extremely cautious. B) A little bird learns to take flight a step at a time.

Push off one foot at a time. This will give you momentum on the ice and will keep you moving. When you first step on the ice use the railing to push yourself away and move one foot away from heel to toe, so the other is used for balance. Note: Don’t concentrate on moving your feet this way, but concentrate more on how just making sure you keep skating.

Bend your knees and spread your wings.  Unlike jogging where your are allowed to swing your arms, when you’re ice skating this is not the greatest thing to do. Basically your arms are going to help keep you balance. Bending your knees will help you push off a little better.

Perfect fit. A perfectly fitting skate should be tight, as in your foot should not be able to move inside the boot. Old school ice skates sizes were often smaller than your actual shoe size. However when trying skates one, try one or a half size smaller. Note: You shouldn’t cram your foot into the boot. It should be a perfect fit, like Cinderella’s glass slipper.

Onto the Don’ts

Avoid rentals. In my opinion, rentals are the Devil. As you’re not sure what will fit right. Ice skates are pretty cheap nowadays so it’s easy to buy your own. However don’t buy too cheaply, as they may fall apart while you’re on the ice. Aim for ones that cost $30 – $50

Don’t buy and skate. I go to Bryant Park to skate and I see tons of adults and teens buy skates and then go on the ice. This is dangerous as the blades are not as sharp as you think and you will not be able to skate properly. Rinks will have sharpening services on the premises, so get them sharpened first. I tend go to Westside Skate & Stick.

(I like this place because they’ll ask you a lot of questions to know how sharp the blade should be. How often you skate, are you casual or pro, even where you normally skate.)

Don’t be a jerk. This mainly applies to people who like to skate like they’re playing hockey, but applies to everyone who’s on the ice. Chopping up the ice looks cool, it’s not really safe for the other people who’ve never skated before or even people who are just skating for fun. The same goes for weaving in and out, and going at break-neck speeds. You are creating more accidents.

If you want to skate like a hockey player, join a team.

You’re not the only one on the ice. Be aware there are other people on the ice, and, more often than not, they don’t know how to ice skate. Leave a personal bubble between you and others.

Avoid the railing. The railing looks nice. It will be there if you fall, and you can pull yourself around the rink without falling. Using the railing as a security blanket is not the best way to ice skate. You have to learn to let go. If you must, try to skate a little away from the railing until you get comfortable skating on your own.

Walking gets you nowhere. Just because you have ice skates doesn’t mean you can walk on ice. Ice has no friction, and trying to walk on ice with sharp blades on your feet won’t help you move (actually it makes you look quite silly). You have to realize you need to glide. It’s called ice skating, not ice walking.

I hope this will help you wherever you choose to go and skate. Ice skating is really great once you know your way around the ice. Here are some places in the city you can go to:

The Pond at Bryant Park – This ice rink is not only in Midtown, but it has free admission. This means all you have to pay is for the skates – and if you have your own all you got to do is walk right in.

Wollman Rink – For some shopping or dropping the kids off somewhere, Wollman is a good central place where you can skate at your leisure.

Trump Lasker Rink – If you mostly hang around uptown near Harlem then this is the most convenient rink to go to. Two hockey-sized outdoor arenas for skating convenience

WWII Veterans Memorial Ice Skating Rink – Don’t want to travel all the way to the city? Staten Island has it’s own rink.

Rockefellar Ice Rink – Everyone’s heard of the famous Rockefellar Ice Rink. Not sure what else I could say that you haven’t heard. However if you want to ice skate at Rockefellar I suggest going after February when admission is cheaper ($14).

W Hotel – It’s small but free (if you own skates). Located on the fifth floor of the W Hotel. Note: It’s only open until February 15th, so grab your skates and head downtown.

Can’t get enough of skating? There are also some indoor rinks around the city to go to when the weather is warmer.

Chelsea Piers Sky Rink – Chelsea Piers is quite a long walk from the hustle and bustle of the city, but it makes up for it by having an entire sports center with a view of the river.

World Ice Arena – You may have to travel all the way to Flushing Meadows Corona Park, but you’ll be able to skate all year round.

Kate Wollman Rink – Sadly there was no outdoor ice skating for Brooklyn this year. However never fear because Parks and Recreations is building a whole new rink to use all year round!

Navigating the subway in frills

Whenever I’m in Lolita and walking around Manhattan, it’s like a different world even though I’ve lived here for a few years already. It must be the headbow blocking the blood circulation to the brain. When I’m in Lolita I seem to get lost more often and I need a certain technique just to get through the turnstile.

The New York City subway is one of the most complex subway systems in the world. Even New Yorkers get lost . However if you follow some simple rules and understand how to get un-lost, you can be well on your way to wherever you’re going.


Deciphering the map.

If you think of New York City as a grid, then you can also decipher where you’re going. If the numbers are going up you are going uptown, and if they are decreasing then you’re going downtown. (Remember signs that say Streets are shorter than Avenues)

How can this be applied to the subway? A lot of the times subway signs list what the last stop is. If the signs point to Brooklyn the train is heading downtown, and if it’s the Bronx it’s heading uptown. And if you’re going to Queens you are heading east and out of Manhattan.

Local and Express.

Express trains will stop only at main intersections. (i.e. N express will stop at Union Sq and Herald Sq, but skips 23rd and 28th St. ) while local trains tend to stop at every stop. If you are new to New York, take the local train. It takes longer to get to your destination, but you’ll make sure you’ll get to your destination instead of realizing the train just past your stop.

What if you take the wrong train or miss your stop? Go on the opposite train. Strangely, people often don’t realize if you just go across the platform you the trains are heading in the opposite directions.

Tackling the turnstile.

The turnstile is tiny and your poof is not. Make sure you try to minimize the amount of petticoats you’re going to wear or wear ones made of chiffon or just plain poly cotton. With less volume you will have less to worry about making a scene when you become stuck because of your poof.

Another thing is to pull out your Metrocard out way before you get to the turnstile. You should be searching for it in your bag as soon as you get into the station but before you reach the turnstile. Make it easier on the person behind you — instead of standing in the middle of subway entrance knowing your Metrocard is somewhere between your keys and makeup case.

Avoid rush hour.

Lolita and rush hour do not mix. Unless you are working at Tokyo Rebel or work at job where you and your office are comfortable with it, I really don’t recommend wearing Lolita to work. And rush hour is the worse when you are trying to cram into a sliver of a space just so you can catch a train to get to work on time.

Imagine that but wearing Lolita.

So avoid the hours between 8-10AM and 3-5PM (if you can).

Stand, don’t sit.

While sitting in an empty car with rows of seats is an ideal train car ride, it’s not always the case. If you’re with a group feel free to claim an empty corner. Lolitas who are together as a group will tend to have your back if you’re getting harassed.

And if you are not going very far, stand instead of finding an empty seat. Since Lolita clothing tends to have a lot of volume, you might not be able to tuck all that skirt under your seat. People will sit wherever they like even if it’s on top of your skirt. Also it’s more charitable to give up your seat for someone who needs it more.

Keep occupied.

If you are on your way to a meet-up by yourself, zone out on your iPod, DS, or book and into your own little world. As long as you feel comfortable in Lolita, people will go about their business and the world will not stop just because you are dressed up in frills. This is really important as people will sense if you know you are dressed out of the ordinary.

However don’t zone out too much because you may miss your stop!

New Yorkers are nice people.

Since Lolita meet-ups are usually on the weekends, the trains are usually all local. Still, read the signs, look for a subway map. Or even ask a person who looks like they know where they’re going. New Yorkers have a history of being mean, but if you ask politely how to get somewhere they’ll be more than willing to help. Unless you’re in Times Square and ask where Broadway is (Hint: Times Square is 42nd St and Broadway, but now it’s a giant pedestrian area so hard to miss).

A few things you should do before you head out the door:

-Check mta.info. This MTA’s website and will also tell you if trains are going certain stops or not running.
-If you have an iPod or iPhone, lookup the address and save the map before you leave the house.
-Make sure your Metrocard is charged and you have it out before you try to go through a turnstile. Or at least step aside.
-Check egl or wherever the meet-up was posted. You never know if there has been last-minute location changes or cancellations.

And most importantly…

Look out for other Lolitas. If you spot a headbow, head in that direction. She’s probably is going the same direction you are. And if she’s not sure where to go, you can get lost together.

Conclusion

This advice applies to anyone traveling the subway, but I hope I’ve covered enough bases so that next time you travel the subway it won’t be frustrating or discomforting. It’s really important no matter where you are to have a good sense of direction and navigation. And with less fuss navigating, all you’ll have to worry about is adjusting your dress or hair in the window so you’re picture perfect when you meet your friends.

Are there any other tips you may want other Lolitas to know when traveling on the subway?

Out and About in Lolita: NYC Style


You already got the basics down for how to dress Lolita, and you’ve RSVP’ed for an upcoming meetup. So the big question now is: what are you going to wear?

While New York City is the fashion capital of the world that doesn’t mean New Yorkers and tourists alike wholly accept Lolita as a fashion. They’ll probably look at you and then walk away, whisper, or worse, follow you onto the train for further harassment. Now does this mean you should never wear Lolita outside and in public? Of course not. If you want to enjoy the company of your frilly friends without the incessant worry of being followed by leary eyes here are some things to consider:

Dress Appropriate. Lolita can be mistaken for a costume a lot of the time, so it’s best to tone down the costume aspect of it. Opt for solid colors or subdued prints. Wear simple cardigans or blouses, and keep deco accessories at home. I lean towards the Classic and Casual Lolita styles because it tends to be easier when walking around the city or incorporating into workwear. If I want to go all out (OTT) I usually save those coordinates for conventions or special occasions (i.e. International Lolita Day, theme-based meet-ups) since most people know what Lolita looks like and I’m more concerned about sticking with the theme.

Comfort is Key. Are you spending most of your times outdoors or indoors? Are you normally cold all the time? Wear a lot of layers you can take off if you get too warm. It’s great to bundle up and preventing future colds, having sweat spots is neither ladylike or ideal conditions for hugging friend you haven’t seen in long time. More than likely you’ll be walking around a lot so opt for comfort than cute. Wear low heels (less than 2″) or flats — the lower heel creates less of an impact while walking so you’re feet won’t hurt as much since you’re putting your weight on your whole foot instead of just your heel.  I also highly recommend rocking horse shoes for those casual outings as well — the foam platform soles make a nice cushion for your feet.

Be Prepared. You never know if there’s going to be a freak snowstorm or high chance of rain (it’s always raining in New York City). I always keep a small folding umbrella in my bag because there have been times where it rains as I go home when there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. So check the weather report the night before or that morning of that scheduled meetup. I would also recommend you check mta.info before you head out the door. There’s a chance that the subway trains are running on time and then there are times where that train you need to transfer onto is not stopping at the station you need. Or map the place you need to meet on your iPhone/iPod or print out a copy of the meetup post – especially when you’ve never been to the area you’re all going to meet up.  Give yourself at least an hour before you leave your house/apartment–this way if you run into train delays you’ll be five minutes late/early as opposed to arriving three hours after everyone has left for somewhere else.

Keep it Simple. No matter where you are in New York City you will be walking to and from someplace. Try not to bring too much baggage. Unless it’s a bag full of gifts or you are returning borrowed items don’t expect someone to carry your second bag for you. You’ll probably carrying that bag all day, and it will get heavier by the end of the day after all that walking. So consolidate as much as you can, and think twice before you bring your DS (Are you really going to use it for the 20 minutes you’re riding on the train?) or that latest Gothic Lolita Bible.

Be Confident If you are wearing Lolita, by definition, you’ve chosen to have the guts to look like you walked out of Candyland. Or Japan. Whether you are just wearing Lolita indoors to bake cookies or going out to see your friends you should have the confidence to wear something you like. Don’t make the clothes wear you. I strongly believe in wearing Lolita as a fashion and not a costume. Especially when people are more than likely to stare when they’re not suppose to. If you wear Lolita like a fashion, people will disregard you less if you think you are wearing a costume. Show others you are wearing something that makes you happy. They’ll see that and leave you alone, or give you compliments. Even better, they may follow in your footsteps.

Of course these are things to take to heart wherever you live. Is there anything that’s a must-have advice for you that Lolitas should know about when hanging out in the city?